Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Parenting Blunders

You know, I don't feel old enough to deal with a 6 (going on 10) year olds issues.

Last week, Gary caught Z doing something we have told him not to do before. We asked him about it and were amazed at the stories - i.e. lies - that came pouring out of his little mouth. He was down right convincing, people!! We told him, "you are not in trouble" (first mistake) but if he lied then he would be. Well, we realized that once he started telling the truth then as long as we reassured him he wasn't in trouble, he kept talking.

There's that line. The line of wanting your child to talk to you but know that if they tell you something they should get in trouble for, it may clam them up. The truth is he should have gotten in trouble for lying in the first place. He knows not to and we told him right then not to!! We ended up just talking to him. Zachary is the kind of kid that you can talk to and give the 'ol guilt trip to and he won't do it again. Period. We are pretty laid back parents because of this.

Today, he did it again.

::sigh:: really?? come on!!

I am so let down. At us for not being harder on him last week, at him for disobeying, at the world we live in where I have to discipline my child. I know it is my responsibility to raise him up to be a man full of integrity. It is just so hard to know what to do! Spank or no spank ; too young for grounding?; was it too harsh to have to miss the Fall Festival tonight which broke his ever loving heart?? enough for him to have to stay in his room all evening and tomorrow evening as well???

Who knows what is best? We just blunder through, you know? Hoping that we are making the right decisions regarding his punishment.

::sigh::

Sara

3 comments:

Mom, Mommy, Mama said...

Him missing something he really wanted to do will leave a lasting impression on him. He will be reminded of it, again next week and it will make him think about what he did again. He will now think twice I bet before doing anything like this again.

Debz said...

Ah...when you figure out all those answers, you can write the Handbook all parent wish existed. Just think how rich you'll be!!

It is hard, isn't it? And then when you feel guilty for a punishment - any punishment - that you KNOW YOU HAD TO ENFORCE. Ugh! That makes it soo much harder. Good luck hon, there's no easy button here. ;)

Amy said...

It sounds like you are parenting from your heart and you have Z's best intrests at heart. That's the right thing to do; you are disciplining him because you love him. You are doing a great job, Sara! :o)