Abigail - 4 lbs 3 oz
Olivia - 4 lbs 6 oz
Blood Pressure - a little high for me 130/70
Weight - -4 34 lbs in all (yes, that is a loss of 4 lbs)
Inches Around - Still 52"
So my appointment was at 8:50. I told the receptionist ladies that I needed a sonogram today because Dr Read said every week I needed one but he forgot to schedule it for today. They said they would check, then sent me back without checking with Dr. Read because he might do it himself. Since when does an OB do sonograms themselves?? I got in around 10:00, not too bad. Of course he said I needed a sonogram. So I settle down to wait to be fit in in-between regular appointments and the 5 (!) emergency ones they had to do. So long story short. I get out of there at 1:15!!! I had to get something to eat at one point because it was just getting ridiculous. Ugh!! The thing about being friendly with your doctor's staff is they tend to see you as more a friend and not a patient. I can't really complain about it because we do know each other so well, so I just sucked it up.
OK, on to the important info. Dr. Read says I am doing extremely well. He said that even with my cervix opening that I could still go all the way until July 2nd. He agrees that I have dropped. They had to go way down with the Doppler to hear Abigail's heartbeat. He reassured me that the baby's weights are good even though they haven't gained hardly any this past week. He said the sonograms can be inaccurate plus their weight gain does tend to slow down. This along with my actual loss of weight is not surprising. Keep in mind that we have two different sonogram machines and two different scales in two different Dr's offices going here. I saw both girls breathe, plus I got to see Abigail's face which I hardly ever get to see because she is so far down there. Olivia is still laying transverse, across my belly. They were both moving like crazy and kicking up a storm.
All is well, again. He said he wants me doing next to nothing all day. I assured him that is my routine; next to nothing all day long, every day. I should be enjoying this because soon it will not be the case.
There was an over abundance of little girl babies in the office today. Believe me I saw a lot come through in the 2 and a half hours I was waiting!! Anyway, there was one that was 6 weeks old. She was so tiny, my gosh, tiny. She weighed 7 something when she was born so my girls will be at least a pound smaller than that and I just can't imagine it! The mom had her mom there to help her and I just thought to myself, "I will have two of those tiny things." It became a little more real to me. It is becoming more and more real everyday.
I can't wait to see my girls!!
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Perspective on Police Officers
I came across this video while reading another infertility blog. It touched my heart and helped me to understand what so many go through with infertility. If you have anyone who is experiencing infertility, watch it. It will open your eyes a little to the thoughts and emotions they are dealing with.
My mom has been driving 45 miles one way every Tuesday and Thursday for the past several months to help me get everything organized and ready for babies. Wow!! And with these gas prices what they are!!!! I am so grateful to her. I found myself pregnant with twins and desperately needing my house to be decorated. We have lived here almost 3 years and did I do anything when I wasn't pregnant?? Nooo...I was planning a wedding, then dealing with our infertility. I really wanted everything to be done when the babies arrived, because I know I will get next to nothing done when they are here. :-)
For the first couple of months we decorated. We painted, made curtains, bought knick knacks, and put it all together. We finished the dining room, the kitchen, and the girl's room. I had already done Z's room. I really need to post pictures because I am quite proud of us. We also organized the kitchen, the garage, and the scary hall closet that goes under the stairs. She also picks up around the house and helps me fold clothes and such when she is here.
But...she won't be here for the next 2 weeks. For this reason alone I cannot have these babies in the next 2 weeks.
She is at the trial for a Dallas police officer that was shot and killed last Spring. One of her best friends is the officer's mom. We have been friends with this family since grade school. He was my first kiss (not many people know that). It was on a dare so it wasn't like we were dating or anything, still, he was my first. Last year when he was killed, I was recovering from my lap surgery so I could not go to the funeral, but what an outpouring of love came from the other police officers and the community. This past year has obviously been super hard on the family and we are hoping that with the trial over with, there will be some closure.
The trial is...well...a trial. When Mark was shot, the bullet caught the edge of his badge and exploded. A piece of it lodged in his neck and hit an artery. His fellow officers dragged him away from the car and into a police cruiser and sped toward the hospital. They tried to stop the bleeding, but as you well know, when an artery is hit, unless you are at the hospital, there is very little you can do. If the bullet was just an inch off, it would have hit his bullet-proof vest and maybe knocked the wind out of him, but because of a fluke, an inch, this man died at the hands of a criminal who should never have been on the streets. Yesterday she sat there with her friend while they watched the police video of him getting shot over and over as the defense attorney attempts to sway the jury into sympathizing with this man who shot a Police Officer. Are you freaking kidding me??
They also have to sit nice and quietly while this same dumb ass, ahem I mean, attorney talks about how this Police Officer who DEFENDS OUR CITY somehow rushed up to the car and in doing that deserved to be shot. Oh, and this was after this Officer and many others chased this guy down and finally caught him. He ran because he had warrants out for his arrest.
They advised the family not to show any emotion during the trial. They sit nice and still just a few feet away from the man who still gets to breathe in and out, who still gets to eat, who still gets to talk to his mother, who still gets to feel the sun on his face, who still gets to brush his teeth. Can you imagine how hard that is to do? You know she just wants to jump over there and rip his throat out. Violent, yes. I know that's what I would do if someone did that to my baby.
Think about them today. Pray for strength so they can sit and listen to the crap this guy dishes out.
But also, pray for the Police Officers out there who try and protect us from the bad guys. Join me in sending a little prayer up whenever I see an officer who has pulled someone over. They are more than just the guys who catch us speeding or running that red (yellow) light. I pray for their safety. I also say a little prayer of gratitude for them standing in that danger zone so we can be a little safer.
My mom has been driving 45 miles one way every Tuesday and Thursday for the past several months to help me get everything organized and ready for babies. Wow!! And with these gas prices what they are!!!! I am so grateful to her. I found myself pregnant with twins and desperately needing my house to be decorated. We have lived here almost 3 years and did I do anything when I wasn't pregnant?? Nooo...I was planning a wedding, then dealing with our infertility. I really wanted everything to be done when the babies arrived, because I know I will get next to nothing done when they are here. :-)
For the first couple of months we decorated. We painted, made curtains, bought knick knacks, and put it all together. We finished the dining room, the kitchen, and the girl's room. I had already done Z's room. I really need to post pictures because I am quite proud of us. We also organized the kitchen, the garage, and the scary hall closet that goes under the stairs. She also picks up around the house and helps me fold clothes and such when she is here.
But...she won't be here for the next 2 weeks. For this reason alone I cannot have these babies in the next 2 weeks.
She is at the trial for a Dallas police officer that was shot and killed last Spring. One of her best friends is the officer's mom. We have been friends with this family since grade school. He was my first kiss (not many people know that). It was on a dare so it wasn't like we were dating or anything, still, he was my first. Last year when he was killed, I was recovering from my lap surgery so I could not go to the funeral, but what an outpouring of love came from the other police officers and the community. This past year has obviously been super hard on the family and we are hoping that with the trial over with, there will be some closure.
The trial is...well...a trial. When Mark was shot, the bullet caught the edge of his badge and exploded. A piece of it lodged in his neck and hit an artery. His fellow officers dragged him away from the car and into a police cruiser and sped toward the hospital. They tried to stop the bleeding, but as you well know, when an artery is hit, unless you are at the hospital, there is very little you can do. If the bullet was just an inch off, it would have hit his bullet-proof vest and maybe knocked the wind out of him, but because of a fluke, an inch, this man died at the hands of a criminal who should never have been on the streets. Yesterday she sat there with her friend while they watched the police video of him getting shot over and over as the defense attorney attempts to sway the jury into sympathizing with this man who shot a Police Officer. Are you freaking kidding me??
They also have to sit nice and quietly while this same dumb ass, ahem I mean, attorney talks about how this Police Officer who DEFENDS OUR CITY somehow rushed up to the car and in doing that deserved to be shot. Oh, and this was after this Officer and many others chased this guy down and finally caught him. He ran because he had warrants out for his arrest.
They advised the family not to show any emotion during the trial. They sit nice and still just a few feet away from the man who still gets to breathe in and out, who still gets to eat, who still gets to talk to his mother, who still gets to feel the sun on his face, who still gets to brush his teeth. Can you imagine how hard that is to do? You know she just wants to jump over there and rip his throat out. Violent, yes. I know that's what I would do if someone did that to my baby.
Think about them today. Pray for strength so they can sit and listen to the crap this guy dishes out.
But also, pray for the Police Officers out there who try and protect us from the bad guys. Join me in sending a little prayer up whenever I see an officer who has pulled someone over. They are more than just the guys who catch us speeding or running that red (yellow) light. I pray for their safety. I also say a little prayer of gratitude for them standing in that danger zone so we can be a little safer.
New Header
Ok, so I did my header on ScrapBlog.com
It was a tiny pain in the butt, although I am happy with the finished result. It is a little big. I am going to try to make it somewhat smaller, but that maybe what we get right there. I miss my dots page and I am going to see if it will work on that page as well, but again, we'll see. I will be playing around with it today.
It was a tiny pain in the butt, although I am happy with the finished result. It is a little big. I am going to try to make it somewhat smaller, but that maybe what we get right there. I miss my dots page and I am going to see if it will work on that page as well, but again, we'll see. I will be playing around with it today.
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
New Look
Bear with me as I try to upload a new blogger header. It is freakin' frustrating, so just hang in there. I promise the end result will be worth it. IT BETTER BE!!
Lack of 32 week belly pic
Well, as you can see; there is no 32 belly week picture. Z came down with a fever on Saturday and it turned out to be Strep Throat, so no dinner date for me. Which meant no dressing up, which meant no make-up, which means no new pic for this week. A little vain? Yes, I believe so. I hope to get one up in the next few days.
My parents came over yesterday to help us clean out the garage. We got these shelves that hang from the ceiling and they are stuffed full of stuff, plus several shelves along the walls. A lot of the stuff is my teaching supplies from when I taught Kindergarten. Even though I know it will be at least 5 years before I go back to it, it kills me to get rid of any of my stuff I have accumulated. I ended up giving about a third of my books to Z's new school library, plus I will sell a lot of my containers and storage supplies that I just don't have room for. I will say this though, other than my school stuff, I have been in this get-rid-of-it phase since last summer. I am a total pack rat, plus I am sentimental. Put those two together and you have a lot of crap. So I last summer I went through Z's baby stuff, my baby stuff, my high school and college stuff, my "stuff I might use one day", and my Donald Duck collection from high school and college and got rid of a TON of it. Yesterday I got rid of even more so I am down to 1 small tub of my baby clothes and toys I want to keep, 1 small tub of Z's baby clothes, and 1 small tub of high school memory crap. This is from about 10 tubs, so be proud of me! Now if I can only get Gary to be just as ruthless with HIS stuff.
My dad hasn't seen me in a few weeks and when he saw me this is how the conversation went...
Dad: Oh my...goodness
Me: I know
My 12 year old nephew: (shaking his head) Holy Toledo
Mom: I told you she was huge!
(Thanks mom)
Me: Z, do you think I am huge? (teasing him)
Z: Yep!
Gary: I think she's beautiful
(Aww...thanks for lying, honey)
Z: ...and big!!
Me: sigh
My parents came over yesterday to help us clean out the garage. We got these shelves that hang from the ceiling and they are stuffed full of stuff, plus several shelves along the walls. A lot of the stuff is my teaching supplies from when I taught Kindergarten. Even though I know it will be at least 5 years before I go back to it, it kills me to get rid of any of my stuff I have accumulated. I ended up giving about a third of my books to Z's new school library, plus I will sell a lot of my containers and storage supplies that I just don't have room for. I will say this though, other than my school stuff, I have been in this get-rid-of-it phase since last summer. I am a total pack rat, plus I am sentimental. Put those two together and you have a lot of crap. So I last summer I went through Z's baby stuff, my baby stuff, my high school and college stuff, my "stuff I might use one day", and my Donald Duck collection from high school and college and got rid of a TON of it. Yesterday I got rid of even more so I am down to 1 small tub of my baby clothes and toys I want to keep, 1 small tub of Z's baby clothes, and 1 small tub of high school memory crap. This is from about 10 tubs, so be proud of me! Now if I can only get Gary to be just as ruthless with HIS stuff.
My dad hasn't seen me in a few weeks and when he saw me this is how the conversation went...
Dad: Oh my...goodness
Me: I know
My 12 year old nephew: (shaking his head) Holy Toledo
Mom: I told you she was huge!
(Thanks mom)
Me: Z, do you think I am huge? (teasing him)
Z: Yep!
Gary: I think she's beautiful
(Aww...thanks for lying, honey)
Z: ...and big!!
Me: sigh
Saturday, May 24, 2008
32 Weeks and 300 visitors in a week
32 Weeks!!! Oh my, I can't believe it. It doesn't seem like it is moving fast but I guess it really is. I am still looking at more than a month if I go all the way to my scheduled date, but to say I am 32 weeks makes me feel better somehow. We are going to dinner tonight with some of Gary's friends, one of which he hasn't seen in years. I am planning on getting dressed up, so I will post a new belly pic after tonight.
My tummy is all of a sudden itchy like mad. The same stretch marks I have had all along are now begging to be scratched. And it feels so good to scratch, but I feel so wrong for doing it. I have tried lotion and that helps a little. I had a few stretch marks that came up over my belly button with Z, but I feel like my skin won't possibly go back down after the massive amount of marks I have now. They are huge!! And they crisscross each other all over. Sigh...girls, you think you might want to lie side by side in there to make a little more room?? No? You like being piled on top of each other overlaping and stretching Mama's skin to the max...hmm?? I will have to remember that when you girls won't go to sleep. I 'll just pile you up on top of each other. :-)
My counter says 300 visitors since last Thursday. Wow!! So I know you are reading, so comments would be great! Yes, this is a shameless asking for comments. :-)
Our baby birds have flown the nest. They have been sitting up and jumping around for several days now. They finally all were gone today. They were really fun to watch. Here is a picture I took this week of the Mama feeding her babies.
We got 2 miracle blankets in the mail from ebay. And from what I have heard on the Multiple message board they truly are miracles. As one MOM said, "she turned to goo." Sounds good to me!! Z immediately wanted to practice wrapping his animals up. So he got his bear and I got his T-rex and we practiced. Rex is now in the swing and his bear is in one of the car seats.
My tummy is all of a sudden itchy like mad. The same stretch marks I have had all along are now begging to be scratched. And it feels so good to scratch, but I feel so wrong for doing it. I have tried lotion and that helps a little. I had a few stretch marks that came up over my belly button with Z, but I feel like my skin won't possibly go back down after the massive amount of marks I have now. They are huge!! And they crisscross each other all over. Sigh...girls, you think you might want to lie side by side in there to make a little more room?? No? You like being piled on top of each other overlaping and stretching Mama's skin to the max...hmm?? I will have to remember that when you girls won't go to sleep. I 'll just pile you up on top of each other. :-)
My counter says 300 visitors since last Thursday. Wow!! So I know you are reading, so comments would be great! Yes, this is a shameless asking for comments. :-)
Our baby birds have flown the nest. They have been sitting up and jumping around for several days now. They finally all were gone today. They were really fun to watch. Here is a picture I took this week of the Mama feeding her babies.
We got 2 miracle blankets in the mail from ebay. And from what I have heard on the Multiple message board they truly are miracles. As one MOM said, "she turned to goo." Sounds good to me!! Z immediately wanted to practice wrapping his animals up. So he got his bear and I got his T-rex and we practiced. Rex is now in the swing and his bear is in one of the car seats.
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Peri Appointment
Abigail - 4lbs 2oz
Olivia - 4 lbs 1oz
(Yep, Abigail has finally caught up and passed Olivia in weight!)
Blood Pressure - Very good, like pre-pregnancy good
Weight - +5 - 38 lbs total ( since last week! )
Inches Around - 52"
Ugh! So it took 2 1/2 hours at the Peri's office today. We couldn't see much. They are laying in an exact " y " shape. Abigail is the long line on the right stretched out from top to bottom with her head down. Olivia's head is up and her body and feet are on top of Abigail. Are they laying nicely on each side so my tummy isn't huge?? No way, not my girls!! They are all piled up on top of each other and stretching my tummy to it's full extent. (So that's why I have new stretch marks that itch like crazy.) I was messing around with a big lump the other night and it turned out to be Olivia's head. I was tapping it and she was moving it around. I thought it was her butt! And...she has hair!! The peri could see fuzz around her head. Amazing, isn't it? They both have more fluid around them than is normal right now, but it is no need for concern. It just adds to my weight :-)
So they are both over 4 pounds now which means that if we go to July 2, we will be looking at having 6 pound babies!! But I don't see that happening because... she also checked my cervix and it is funneling. Well, since it is my body and my body can't possibly do something normally, it is not exactly funneling. It is opening from the inside, but in a long thin way, not a short wide way. So, I get to take it even more easily, not exactly bedrest, but staying off my feet as much as possible. I have to drink a gallon of water every day. Holy Crap!! Can you say in the bathroom all day?? I have to monitor my contractions and have to call if I have more than 4 an hour. So, I am hoping we can keep them in for another several weeks. 5 pound babies with healthy lungs would be good.
Ok, I am ready to stop gaining weight now. Since weeks 28 - 32 are twins' growth spurt time, their weight gain will slow down so hopefully my weight gain will too. Even though I am under the 50 - 60 lbs they recommend me gaining, I am heading toward 40 pounds quickly.
Olivia - 4 lbs 1oz
(Yep, Abigail has finally caught up and passed Olivia in weight!)
Blood Pressure - Very good, like pre-pregnancy good
Weight - +5 - 38 lbs total ( since last week! )
Inches Around - 52"
Ugh! So it took 2 1/2 hours at the Peri's office today. We couldn't see much. They are laying in an exact " y " shape. Abigail is the long line on the right stretched out from top to bottom with her head down. Olivia's head is up and her body and feet are on top of Abigail. Are they laying nicely on each side so my tummy isn't huge?? No way, not my girls!! They are all piled up on top of each other and stretching my tummy to it's full extent. (So that's why I have new stretch marks that itch like crazy.) I was messing around with a big lump the other night and it turned out to be Olivia's head. I was tapping it and she was moving it around. I thought it was her butt! And...she has hair!! The peri could see fuzz around her head. Amazing, isn't it? They both have more fluid around them than is normal right now, but it is no need for concern. It just adds to my weight :-)
So they are both over 4 pounds now which means that if we go to July 2, we will be looking at having 6 pound babies!! But I don't see that happening because... she also checked my cervix and it is funneling. Well, since it is my body and my body can't possibly do something normally, it is not exactly funneling. It is opening from the inside, but in a long thin way, not a short wide way. So, I get to take it even more easily, not exactly bedrest, but staying off my feet as much as possible. I have to drink a gallon of water every day. Holy Crap!! Can you say in the bathroom all day?? I have to monitor my contractions and have to call if I have more than 4 an hour. So, I am hoping we can keep them in for another several weeks. 5 pound babies with healthy lungs would be good.
Ok, I am ready to stop gaining weight now. Since weeks 28 - 32 are twins' growth spurt time, their weight gain will slow down so hopefully my weight gain will too. Even though I am under the 50 - 60 lbs they recommend me gaining, I am heading toward 40 pounds quickly.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
I think the babies dropped
Gary thinks so too. I realized this last night before I went to bed. I just felt like they were all of a sudden lower. My tummy is definitely lower and I am feeling lots more downward pressure. Hmmm...Is this the beginning of the end??
Also, I woke up yesterday feeling very antsy. I was anxious and at loose ends. I wanted to DO something; organize something, clean something, anything!! There's not a lot I can do right now. So, I made a list of things I need to add to my hospital bag.
Here's my list:
*PJ's
*Cotton Nightgown
*Big stretchy undies
*Nursing bra
*Clothes to come home in
*Socks
*Pads
*Nursing Pads
*Lanolin Cream
*Glasses
*Pillow
*Extra bag for hospital goodies
*Phone Charger
*Lip Stuff and Vasoline
*Change for Vending Machines
*Snacks
*Bathroom stuff like shampoo, conditioner, etc.
For Babies
*Wipes
*Coming Home outfits
*pacis
*blankets
*socks, hats, and mittens
*nail clippers
Did I forget anything?? Let me know if there is anything I need to add.
We also got out the car seats to make sure they fit in our car. They do, which is a good thing. That means we can bring them home. Then there they sat, two little pink car seats, all ready for two little girls to be in them and it suddenly hit me. We are having two baby girls!! I got all excited.
Today, I am completely wiped out. My right hip has started hurting in the middle of the night. It doesn't matter which side I lay on, if I prop it on a pillow, not on a pillow, straighten it, not straighten it, hang it off the bed, nothing makes it stop hurting. The pain goes all the way down my leg through the bone to my knee. It doesn't hurt when I am walking or sitting, only when I lie down. Needless to say, I am not sleeping all that great only because of this.
Sigh...The energy spurt was nice while it lasted.
Also, I woke up yesterday feeling very antsy. I was anxious and at loose ends. I wanted to DO something; organize something, clean something, anything!! There's not a lot I can do right now. So, I made a list of things I need to add to my hospital bag.
Here's my list:
*PJ's
*Cotton Nightgown
*Big stretchy undies
*Nursing bra
*Clothes to come home in
*Socks
*Pads
*Nursing Pads
*Lanolin Cream
*Glasses
*Pillow
*Extra bag for hospital goodies
*Phone Charger
*Lip Stuff and Vasoline
*Change for Vending Machines
*Snacks
*Bathroom stuff like shampoo, conditioner, etc.
For Babies
*Wipes
*Coming Home outfits
*pacis
*blankets
*socks, hats, and mittens
*nail clippers
Did I forget anything?? Let me know if there is anything I need to add.
We also got out the car seats to make sure they fit in our car. They do, which is a good thing. That means we can bring them home. Then there they sat, two little pink car seats, all ready for two little girls to be in them and it suddenly hit me. We are having two baby girls!! I got all excited.
Today, I am completely wiped out. My right hip has started hurting in the middle of the night. It doesn't matter which side I lay on, if I prop it on a pillow, not on a pillow, straighten it, not straighten it, hang it off the bed, nothing makes it stop hurting. The pain goes all the way down my leg through the bone to my knee. It doesn't hurt when I am walking or sitting, only when I lie down. Needless to say, I am not sleeping all that great only because of this.
Sigh...The energy spurt was nice while it lasted.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Thoughts about infertility
I almost didn't post it, but when you read someone's blog you get the bad days along with the good, right? My thoughts are a little scattered today, so bear with me. I am hoping to get some of these thoughts out of my head that have been rattling around. Don't take offense to anything said here. These are just random thoughts and feelings.
I haven't said much about our journey through infertility because it was such a short trip. Sometimes I don't feel ...I don't know...worthy to carry that title. I feel lucky that we were able to get all our information lined up in time to go ahead with IVF the first time and in a matter of months after finding out our problems. There are so many couples out there who have tried everything multiple times, IUI, IVF, Clomid, other injectibles, for years only to not have what we accomplished in a year. On the other hand, there is nothing, nothing lucky about infertility.
As short as it was, it was a painful journey for us. I haven't talked to many people about how it really was. My mom, of course, was and still is the most understanding besides Gary. Probably just because she lets me talk. Even some of my closest friends couldn't relate. I heard that I should be thankful that I already have one child. I heard that maybe it just wasn't meant to be, me having any more kids. I heard "Oh, it'll all work out." Yes, I hear all this, but tell this to my heart that has so much room for children. Tell that to the child in me that had 9 dolls and everyone had a name, birthday, and Christmas stocking complete with gifts. Tell these things to me as I send my oldest off to Kindergarten and my arms ached to hold a baby.
I remember the day we found out we could not have a child naturally, or "spontaneously" as is the politically correct term. I was completely devastated. My body had turned against me. My "easy to get pregnant" body had taken the beautiful experience of my son's birth and manipulated it in a way that would cause me to not be able to have any more. You can read about that here. But even there I glossed over the details.
And the months of uncertainty that followed were awful. And let me just say this. So many women get offended when asked if they conceived "naturally". They say that every baby is natural and blah blah blah. I get it, but there was nothing natural about putting a needle in my leg for 2 months, putting 2 needles in my stomach for a week, having internal ultrasounds every other day, giving blood every other day, paying thousands of dollars, having a Dr push a needle into the wall of my vagina to extract my eggs, having to lie on a table spread eagle as that same Dr put my embryos back in, thus getting me pregnant as my husband stood 3 feet away from me. Miraculous? Absolutely!! Natural? Nope, nothing about that was natural. Not when we did all that instead of just hanging a sock on the door knob of our bedroom.
Sigh...ok time for a small smile during my tyraid
Comic relief:
At my husband's office shower, one of the ladies was taking a picture of us and made a joke about how far apart we were sitting. She said something like, That's not how you got pregnant. We looked at each other and laughed because that is exactly how we got pregnant, by being apart from each other.
I don't mean to be a downer but that is where my head is today. I am thinking of how I took everything for granted with my first one. I got off of birth control and the next cycle I was pregnant. I was "Fertile Myrtle" and didn't know any different. I was one of those who believed it would happen for everyone who just relaxed. Yea, I know, I hang my head in shame now.
Even though it did work out for us in record timing, I will always have a special place in my heart for women who struggle with this for years. For all the women who hate the thought of May coming around with no baby in their arms to celebrate with. There will always be a part of my heart that aches for the lose of my naivety regarding infertility. It is something I never wanted to know about. Now that I do, I cherish my knowledge and insight and hope I can help others in their struggles.
I added a link to the left about an infertility thread. I am not sure I can actually wear one, but I wanted to pass it on. If you ever do see a woman with a pomegranate colored string bracelet on her wrist, give her a break. Give her an extra smile and send up a prayer for her. She is hurting in a way that no one gets.
I haven't said much about our journey through infertility because it was such a short trip. Sometimes I don't feel ...I don't know...worthy to carry that title. I feel lucky that we were able to get all our information lined up in time to go ahead with IVF the first time and in a matter of months after finding out our problems. There are so many couples out there who have tried everything multiple times, IUI, IVF, Clomid, other injectibles, for years only to not have what we accomplished in a year. On the other hand, there is nothing, nothing lucky about infertility.
As short as it was, it was a painful journey for us. I haven't talked to many people about how it really was. My mom, of course, was and still is the most understanding besides Gary. Probably just because she lets me talk. Even some of my closest friends couldn't relate. I heard that I should be thankful that I already have one child. I heard that maybe it just wasn't meant to be, me having any more kids. I heard "Oh, it'll all work out." Yes, I hear all this, but tell this to my heart that has so much room for children. Tell that to the child in me that had 9 dolls and everyone had a name, birthday, and Christmas stocking complete with gifts. Tell these things to me as I send my oldest off to Kindergarten and my arms ached to hold a baby.
I remember the day we found out we could not have a child naturally, or "spontaneously" as is the politically correct term. I was completely devastated. My body had turned against me. My "easy to get pregnant" body had taken the beautiful experience of my son's birth and manipulated it in a way that would cause me to not be able to have any more. You can read about that here. But even there I glossed over the details.
And the months of uncertainty that followed were awful. And let me just say this. So many women get offended when asked if they conceived "naturally". They say that every baby is natural and blah blah blah. I get it, but there was nothing natural about putting a needle in my leg for 2 months, putting 2 needles in my stomach for a week, having internal ultrasounds every other day, giving blood every other day, paying thousands of dollars, having a Dr push a needle into the wall of my vagina to extract my eggs, having to lie on a table spread eagle as that same Dr put my embryos back in, thus getting me pregnant as my husband stood 3 feet away from me. Miraculous? Absolutely!! Natural? Nope, nothing about that was natural. Not when we did all that instead of just hanging a sock on the door knob of our bedroom.
Sigh...ok time for a small smile during my tyraid
Comic relief:
At my husband's office shower, one of the ladies was taking a picture of us and made a joke about how far apart we were sitting. She said something like, That's not how you got pregnant. We looked at each other and laughed because that is exactly how we got pregnant, by being apart from each other.
I don't mean to be a downer but that is where my head is today. I am thinking of how I took everything for granted with my first one. I got off of birth control and the next cycle I was pregnant. I was "Fertile Myrtle" and didn't know any different. I was one of those who believed it would happen for everyone who just relaxed. Yea, I know, I hang my head in shame now.
Even though it did work out for us in record timing, I will always have a special place in my heart for women who struggle with this for years. For all the women who hate the thought of May coming around with no baby in their arms to celebrate with. There will always be a part of my heart that aches for the lose of my naivety regarding infertility. It is something I never wanted to know about. Now that I do, I cherish my knowledge and insight and hope I can help others in their struggles.
I added a link to the left about an infertility thread. I am not sure I can actually wear one, but I wanted to pass it on. If you ever do see a woman with a pomegranate colored string bracelet on her wrist, give her a break. Give her an extra smile and send up a prayer for her. She is hurting in a way that no one gets.
Friday, May 16, 2008
OB Appointment
Abigail - 3 lbs 10 oz
Olivia - 3 lbs 11 oz
Blood Pressure - excellent
Weight - +1 - 33 lbs total
Inches Around - Still 51
I think me and the girls grow in spurts.
We had a great appointment! I was even called his "star patient". Yay!! I had no problems to report and nothing to discuss so it was a short and sweet appointment. Sigh...which means I feel like a bit of an idiot for all my complaints last week. It comes in waves. There are weeks when I feel like I can't make it another day much less 7 weeks. On the other hand, there are weeks, like this one, when I feel I can go on for another 2 or 3 months. I feel big but I guess my body has adjusted since last weeks growth spurt. I hope this rides out for another 8 weeks, but if not, you'll just have to listen to some more whining from a huge pregnant woman.
On a brighter note, the girls are right on track. Abigail was breathing! Her little diaphragm was moving up and down. It was so cool to watch! Their weights are actually a little bigger than on track so that's good news! Grow, girls, grow!!
Olivia - 3 lbs 11 oz
Blood Pressure - excellent
Weight - +1 - 33 lbs total
Inches Around - Still 51
I think me and the girls grow in spurts.
We had a great appointment! I was even called his "star patient". Yay!! I had no problems to report and nothing to discuss so it was a short and sweet appointment. Sigh...which means I feel like a bit of an idiot for all my complaints last week. It comes in waves. There are weeks when I feel like I can't make it another day much less 7 weeks. On the other hand, there are weeks, like this one, when I feel I can go on for another 2 or 3 months. I feel big but I guess my body has adjusted since last weeks growth spurt. I hope this rides out for another 8 weeks, but if not, you'll just have to listen to some more whining from a huge pregnant woman.
On a brighter note, the girls are right on track. Abigail was breathing! Her little diaphragm was moving up and down. It was so cool to watch! Their weights are actually a little bigger than on track so that's good news! Grow, girls, grow!!
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Mother's Day
I had a great Mother's Day thanks to my wonderful husband and son. Gary set his alarm to get up early. This was after a night of sneezing fit after sneezing fit. Allergies have hit our house in full force. He got up to go to the store to get breakfast before I woke up. We are usually at church on Sundays but since I don't have anything to wear, it has become our day to sleep in. He made all my favorites; bacon, fruit, yogurt, and croissants. He got me pink roses for the table. So sweet!! He knows I am into pink right now :-)
OK, on the the presents, but first some back history: Several years ago when I was divorced, my mom started me a charm bracelet. Every Mother's Day, she takes Z to choose a new one. The initial idea behind this was for Zachary to choose something that he liked so that it would grow through his stages with him. The first year was a train because he was so into his Thomas the Train. The second year, he was really into John Deere and my mom thought he would choose that one, but as soon as he saw the ladybug he knew I would like it and could not be talked out of it. Last year, my mom and I tried to explain that these were his charms to choose to go on my bracelet. Nope! Mama was a girl and she needed girly things on it, not boy things. He could not be persuaded. So he picked out the sign language hand that says I love you. We sign that to each other all the time.
This year he wanted to get me the set that has a key that fits inside the heart. He wanted to wear one and he wanted me to wear the other. Aww...my sweet boy!! But he saw this key and liked it better. We call it the key to his heart. Gary got me the peas in a pod one from the girls. I was so excited to find one. I love the whole 2 peas in a pod thing for twins.
Another great twins find!!
But first a little history, again: I started collecting the Willow Tree family when Z was born, but then the whole husband and wife with baby no longer fit, so my mom got me this one to represent me with Zachary. I treasure it.
So, when I passed these in a window on Mother's Day I couldn't pass them up. It is so perfect!! The mother with her son is separate from the two babies. I have been hoping that Willow Tree would come out with a twins one and they did!! Yay!! Z says Gary is at work :-)
And finally, I had to share this. Z made it in school. He was very irritated that his teacher did not help him with my age. So funny!! He says it is actually supposed to be 16, because 16 is SO old, right? My favorite food is shrimp (not really, but shhh) and he loves me because "she is pretty" I think that is a pretty decent likeness of me, don't you? I used to be a Kindergarten teacher and I would have my class do things like this for Mother's Day. I never knew how treasured they would be until I got one. It makes me all tingly inside.
Happy Mother's Day!!
OK, on the the presents, but first some back history: Several years ago when I was divorced, my mom started me a charm bracelet. Every Mother's Day, she takes Z to choose a new one. The initial idea behind this was for Zachary to choose something that he liked so that it would grow through his stages with him. The first year was a train because he was so into his Thomas the Train. The second year, he was really into John Deere and my mom thought he would choose that one, but as soon as he saw the ladybug he knew I would like it and could not be talked out of it. Last year, my mom and I tried to explain that these were his charms to choose to go on my bracelet. Nope! Mama was a girl and she needed girly things on it, not boy things. He could not be persuaded. So he picked out the sign language hand that says I love you. We sign that to each other all the time.
My bracelet before this year's are added:
This year he wanted to get me the set that has a key that fits inside the heart. He wanted to wear one and he wanted me to wear the other. Aww...my sweet boy!! But he saw this key and liked it better. We call it the key to his heart. Gary got me the peas in a pod one from the girls. I was so excited to find one. I love the whole 2 peas in a pod thing for twins. 
Another great twins find!!
But first a little history, again: I started collecting the Willow Tree family when Z was born, but then the whole husband and wife with baby no longer fit, so my mom got me this one to represent me with Zachary. I treasure it.
So, when I passed these in a window on Mother's Day I couldn't pass them up. It is so perfect!! The mother with her son is separate from the two babies. I have been hoping that Willow Tree would come out with a twins one and they did!! Yay!! Z says Gary is at work :-)
And finally, I had to share this. Z made it in school. He was very irritated that his teacher did not help him with my age. So funny!! He says it is actually supposed to be 16, because 16 is SO old, right? My favorite food is shrimp (not really, but shhh) and he loves me because "she is pretty" I think that is a pretty decent likeness of me, don't you? I used to be a Kindergarten teacher and I would have my class do things like this for Mother's Day. I never knew how treasured they would be until I got one. It makes me all tingly inside.
Happy Mother's Day!!
Sunday, May 11, 2008
30 week picture
And look!! A different shirt!
I know it is still a shade of pink, but at least it is a different shirt.
I know it is still a shade of pink, but at least it is a different shirt.
Clothing Crisis Averted:
It was looking pretty dire there for a little bit, but I went to a Motherhood Maternity that actually has a decent plus size section. I got some shorts and some shirts that are not just frumpy T-shirts and they can grow with me, so I am set for the remainder of the time. I even found a couple of nice shirts that I can wear with my knit shorts and can pass for a nice outfit to wear to church. Now I just have to find some shoes to stuff my marshmallow feet in. Crocs are ok for church, right??
I wish I had fashion business sense because I could totally get rich. There is a gold mine of opportunity for someone to scoop up. Maternity Clothes for MOMs (Mothers of Multiples). We desperately need someone to save us during that last trimester. Regular shirts with extra big room in the tummy are hard to find!! In this day of triplets, quads, and more MOMs need more variety. So someone, go make a fortune!!
And last but not least: My swollen feet. I had to take a picture. Weak stomachs avert your eyes.
Friday, May 9, 2008
Babies, Babies, Everywhere
Here is the mama's head sticking up out of the nest.
Every year we hang a basket of flowers out on the porch and this year, for the 2nd time, a mama bird has built her nest in it. Z and I decided we would rather have baby birds than pretty flowers :-) There are five of them in there and hopefully we will get to see them fly off for the first time. When we looked at them the first time, I made tweet-tweet sounds and they all lifted their heads for food, so cute!!
In other baby news, my brother just added a new baby donkey.
So Cute!!
Mama was very protective of baby
These are pictures from my parent's backyard.
This is where I grew up.
Mama was very protective of baby
These are pictures from my parent's backyard.
This is where I grew up.
Surprise Sonogram Today
Abigail - 3lbs 3 oz
Olivia - 3lbs 6 oz
I had some issues and called my OB nurse. She told me to come on in. Immediately my heart dropped and tears came to my eyes because as uncomfortable as I am, these babies are not ready to come out!
Everything is fine. It turns out it is severe edema that has spread. He told me to cut down (even more) on my salt intake, put my feet up, and push water to help with the swelling. He spent a lot of time listening to the babies' heart beats. He had me turn this way and that way. I started to get worried, but he said that he just wanted to get right on top of them and not get an echo. He ordered a sonogram, which worried me even more, but he assured me that everything is fine. He just wanted to get a good reading of their heartbeats.
The girl's are fine and the sonogram went well. They have grown like crazy!! In one week Abigail gained 13 oz and Olivia gained 9 oz!! No wonder I am getting uncomfortable.
So all is well...
Olivia - 3lbs 6 oz
I had some issues and called my OB nurse. She told me to come on in. Immediately my heart dropped and tears came to my eyes because as uncomfortable as I am, these babies are not ready to come out!
Everything is fine. It turns out it is severe edema that has spread. He told me to cut down (even more) on my salt intake, put my feet up, and push water to help with the swelling. He spent a lot of time listening to the babies' heart beats. He had me turn this way and that way. I started to get worried, but he said that he just wanted to get right on top of them and not get an echo. He ordered a sonogram, which worried me even more, but he assured me that everything is fine. He just wanted to get a good reading of their heartbeats.
The girl's are fine and the sonogram went well. They have grown like crazy!! In one week Abigail gained 13 oz and Olivia gained 9 oz!! No wonder I am getting uncomfortable.
So all is well...
Glucose Test Results
I passed my 3 hour glucose test!! Yay! I barely failed the 1 hour one but they have to follow through with the 3 hour one. I am so glad I passed. It would not have been fun to have to watch every bite that I ate.
Thank you to all who ask about me on a regular basis. It is nice to be loved and thought about.
Thank you to all who ask about me on a regular basis. It is nice to be loved and thought about.
"How are you feeling?"
Do you want the polite answer or the real thing?
How I am feeling...hmmm. First I am going to give you the nice, no complaining answer. For being 30 weeks pregnant with twins, I am doing great! I have no pre-term labor signs, no bedrest, blood pressure is good, swelling is normal twins stuff. Most women are on bedrest by now and really concerned about their babies coming any time. I feel very blessed to be worry free at this point.
WARNING: WHINING AHEAD
OK, now stop reading if you don't want to hear ramblings of an emotional pregnant woman.
In reality...um, not so much. At first I was super excited to have a date, an end is in sight, right? Then I started thinking and adding all those days up. They told me at the first that the goal was 35 weeks. which would be around the middle of June. Aww...June babies, it's not so blistering hot yet, Z will be out of school for a few weeks to help him and me get prepared, yes, good, June is going to be lovely!! Then the reality of July 2nd came crashing in. A whole freaking month to get through after Z is out for the summer. When you have been thinking it would be a few short weeks away all of a sudden adding just 2 weeks to it would bring even the strongest of pregnant women to their knees in tears. Don't get me wrong, I want these girls to be the healthiest they possibly can be, and I will suffer through another whole month if it would mean they are the healthiest possible. Believe me, I remind myself of this on a daily basis. It is the only thing getting me through right now.
There is a point in pregnancy when you are uncomfortable doing everything. It doesn't matter what position you are in; sitting, laying down, walking, lounging, you are just plain uncomfortable. This happened to me when I was about 38 weeks along with Z and my 39th week was miserable. Pretty common right? Well...I am there now. And I have 2 months to go, well, 7 weeks and 5 days, but who's counting ? ME!! So here goes a list of physical complaints that I am experiencing.
~My feet are huge. I mean Fred Flinstone, jiggling when I walk huge. I can only wear one pair of black and red men's Crocs that go so well with everything. Yes, that was sarcasm. Even Z has told me in a really sympathetic voice how swollen they are and how when I walk down the stairs they creak extra loud. Aww...thanks honey.
~My belly button hurts is starting to stretch and be painful. I have had my skin itch like crazy when it is stretching but now it is just plain hurts. I had laparoscopic surgery through my belly button last Spring and that scar is starting to stretch. Yikes!!
~I have major swelling in the skin of my lower tummy. It is hard and painful to the touch. Because of this I can only wear knit pants or shorts. I can't wear the cute maternity shorts with the panel. Which leads me to...
THE CLOTHING CRISIS
Will I be naked the last 2 months of pregnancy?
Tomorrow I will continue with my rambling complaints :-)
How I am feeling...hmmm. First I am going to give you the nice, no complaining answer. For being 30 weeks pregnant with twins, I am doing great! I have no pre-term labor signs, no bedrest, blood pressure is good, swelling is normal twins stuff. Most women are on bedrest by now and really concerned about their babies coming any time. I feel very blessed to be worry free at this point.
WARNING: WHINING AHEAD
OK, now stop reading if you don't want to hear ramblings of an emotional pregnant woman.
In reality...um, not so much. At first I was super excited to have a date, an end is in sight, right? Then I started thinking and adding all those days up. They told me at the first that the goal was 35 weeks. which would be around the middle of June. Aww...June babies, it's not so blistering hot yet, Z will be out of school for a few weeks to help him and me get prepared, yes, good, June is going to be lovely!! Then the reality of July 2nd came crashing in. A whole freaking month to get through after Z is out for the summer. When you have been thinking it would be a few short weeks away all of a sudden adding just 2 weeks to it would bring even the strongest of pregnant women to their knees in tears. Don't get me wrong, I want these girls to be the healthiest they possibly can be, and I will suffer through another whole month if it would mean they are the healthiest possible. Believe me, I remind myself of this on a daily basis. It is the only thing getting me through right now.
There is a point in pregnancy when you are uncomfortable doing everything. It doesn't matter what position you are in; sitting, laying down, walking, lounging, you are just plain uncomfortable. This happened to me when I was about 38 weeks along with Z and my 39th week was miserable. Pretty common right? Well...I am there now. And I have 2 months to go, well, 7 weeks and 5 days, but who's counting ? ME!! So here goes a list of physical complaints that I am experiencing.
~My feet are huge. I mean Fred Flinstone, jiggling when I walk huge. I can only wear one pair of black and red men's Crocs that go so well with everything. Yes, that was sarcasm. Even Z has told me in a really sympathetic voice how swollen they are and how when I walk down the stairs they creak extra loud. Aww...thanks honey.
~My belly button hurts is starting to stretch and be painful. I have had my skin itch like crazy when it is stretching but now it is just plain hurts. I had laparoscopic surgery through my belly button last Spring and that scar is starting to stretch. Yikes!!
~I have major swelling in the skin of my lower tummy. It is hard and painful to the touch. Because of this I can only wear knit pants or shorts. I can't wear the cute maternity shorts with the panel. Which leads me to...
THE CLOTHING CRISIS
Will I be naked the last 2 months of pregnancy?
Tomorrow I will continue with my rambling complaints :-)
Monday, May 5, 2008
Tagged
I got "tagged" to list 6 unimportant things about myself. Isn't it funny how special we feel when we have been tagged. I actually got tagged about a month ago, but I am just now getting to it. I don't know the tagged rules, but I'm doing it now. So here goes:
1. I am a speed reader, a super speed reader. I read the 6th Harry Potter book in a day (Of course, that's all I did that day). I usually do finish a book in a day. My husband will look over and ask, "Did you start another book?"
2. My brother chose my middle name, Cindi. He named me after his Kindergarten teacher. I used to absolutely hate it, but then I figured out he loved the fact that I hated it, so I learned to deal with it. They used to run my first and middle name together "Saracindi"...Umm..yea...I still hate that.
(Gosh this is hard, I should have thought about this before I started)
3. I don't think there should be different time zones around the world. I cannot comprehend how I leave my home on a Saturday and arrive on the other side of the world on Friday. I have a solution to the problem also, but no one had asked me to save the world so....
4. I grew up in the country on 80+ acres of land to roam around at will. I grew up chasing junebugs, grasshoppers, throwing spear grass, picking dewberries, swimming in creeks, and fishing with bamboo poles and I wouldn't trade it for anything.
5. I played the French Horn in band in Junior High and High School. Yes, I was one of those people, those band people. French Horns still blow best!
6. Bacon is my guilty pleasure. I could eat a pound of bacon by myself with no help. When my husband makes bacon he has to cook extra because he knows I will eat half of it while he is cooking it.
That was harder than I thought. That took forever for me to finish!!
I was tagged by a wonderful on-line friend, in the middle of a horrible time in her life. Her babies were born at 23 weeks and they died. Her and her husband lovingly refer to them as "the Doodles". We had the same due date and we went through IVF together, so because of this I feel a connection to her. I know some people find this odd since I have never met her in real life, but in some ways she knows what I have been through with IVF and the fears that come with it more than my real life friends. She is such an incredibly strong woman. I admire her courage in getting out of bed each morning, even when she probably doesn't feel like it. I have grieved along with her over her precious doodles and not a day goes by when I don't lift her and her husband up in prayer. So I take this time to mention her and honor the memory of her babies.
And...I tag Sarah (who just started her blog), Katie, April, and Aimee (who just had her babies and may not have time for this) Have fun ladies!
1. I am a speed reader, a super speed reader. I read the 6th Harry Potter book in a day (Of course, that's all I did that day). I usually do finish a book in a day. My husband will look over and ask, "Did you start another book?"
2. My brother chose my middle name, Cindi. He named me after his Kindergarten teacher. I used to absolutely hate it, but then I figured out he loved the fact that I hated it, so I learned to deal with it. They used to run my first and middle name together "Saracindi"...Umm..yea...I still hate that.
(Gosh this is hard, I should have thought about this before I started)
3. I don't think there should be different time zones around the world. I cannot comprehend how I leave my home on a Saturday and arrive on the other side of the world on Friday. I have a solution to the problem also, but no one had asked me to save the world so....
4. I grew up in the country on 80+ acres of land to roam around at will. I grew up chasing junebugs, grasshoppers, throwing spear grass, picking dewberries, swimming in creeks, and fishing with bamboo poles and I wouldn't trade it for anything.
5. I played the French Horn in band in Junior High and High School. Yes, I was one of those people, those band people. French Horns still blow best!
6. Bacon is my guilty pleasure. I could eat a pound of bacon by myself with no help. When my husband makes bacon he has to cook extra because he knows I will eat half of it while he is cooking it.
That was harder than I thought. That took forever for me to finish!!
I was tagged by a wonderful on-line friend, in the middle of a horrible time in her life. Her babies were born at 23 weeks and they died. Her and her husband lovingly refer to them as "the Doodles". We had the same due date and we went through IVF together, so because of this I feel a connection to her. I know some people find this odd since I have never met her in real life, but in some ways she knows what I have been through with IVF and the fears that come with it more than my real life friends. She is such an incredibly strong woman. I admire her courage in getting out of bed each morning, even when she probably doesn't feel like it. I have grieved along with her over her precious doodles and not a day goes by when I don't lift her and her husband up in prayer. So I take this time to mention her and honor the memory of her babies.
And...I tag Sarah (who just started her blog), Katie, April, and Aimee (who just had her babies and may not have time for this) Have fun ladies!
Friday, May 2, 2008
OB appointment - We have a date!
July 2nd!! He gave me a choice of that or June 30th. Since the 30th is my b-day, I went with the 2nd. He said by waiting until this date, it gives my babies the best chance in actually being able to come home with me. He also said we will have to monitor very closely those last few weeks so I will not into labor on my own. So, July the 2nd at the very latest is when these two darlings will be here. It is so great to have a date to actually get to. That's only 2 months away!
Let me pause by saying, "I love my OB!" He is a red-headed-with-freckles Jamaican and has this great accent. I know it is hard to picture, but he is wonderful! The scale was right after all, plus according to their scale, I gained 2 pounds since yesterday. Did he say a word about it? Nope! Well, other than "dang girl!" but no chastising, no "you need to cut back" nothing. The girls were moving around too much to get a good Doppler read on their heartbeats, but since I saw them yesterday and they are obviously moving around, I wasn't worried too much about that. When they kick the Doppler it make a huge noise and it is funny to see the nurses face as she tries to avoid that noise, but still get their readings. Nope, they were having none of it.
Z has started telling the girls good-bye in the morning when I drop him off at school. He'll say "Bye Abigail" to one side of my tummy and switch to the other side to say good-bye to Olivia. Then he'll rub his hands on both sides. I may have met my match as far his favorite person on earth. Soon his attention will shift to them and away from me. Gary and I already know where we stand. Every night when he prays, he says, "I am thankful for Ally ( the cat), the babies, Mama, and Gary." So we know the pecking order in our house :-)
One more thing, my RE (Fertility Specialist) shares an office with my OB and I see my nurses that helped me through IVF every time I go in and we chit-chat. Today as I was sitting there getting my blood work done for the 3 hour glucose testing, I realized I was sitting in the same chair I sat in back in October when I was going through IVF. That day the nurse told me that because of a sudden cyst on my ovary we were going to have to push back when we could start the next step of the process. IVF is such a delicate time table that any delay could mean starting completely over with the next cycle. And when you are in the middle of your infertility journey with hormones, shots, exams on a daily basis, any delay is heartbreaking. I remembered sitting there crying and my wonderful nurse holding my hand and telling me that it would be ok, that we would have a baby in the right time. (It turned out that the cyst went away and we were able to move forward as planned) As I sat there today with 2 beautiful baby girls snug inside me, remembering, it almost brought tears to my eyes. Talk about coming full circle, you know. I just have to take a moment and say a prayer of thanks that God has blessed us with these two miracle babies. How precious they are and how precious that I got a moment of reflection that prompted me to be thankful and grateful for where I am in my life right now.
Let me pause by saying, "I love my OB!" He is a red-headed-with-freckles Jamaican and has this great accent. I know it is hard to picture, but he is wonderful! The scale was right after all, plus according to their scale, I gained 2 pounds since yesterday. Did he say a word about it? Nope! Well, other than "dang girl!" but no chastising, no "you need to cut back" nothing. The girls were moving around too much to get a good Doppler read on their heartbeats, but since I saw them yesterday and they are obviously moving around, I wasn't worried too much about that. When they kick the Doppler it make a huge noise and it is funny to see the nurses face as she tries to avoid that noise, but still get their readings. Nope, they were having none of it.
Z has started telling the girls good-bye in the morning when I drop him off at school. He'll say "Bye Abigail" to one side of my tummy and switch to the other side to say good-bye to Olivia. Then he'll rub his hands on both sides. I may have met my match as far his favorite person on earth. Soon his attention will shift to them and away from me. Gary and I already know where we stand. Every night when he prays, he says, "I am thankful for Ally ( the cat), the babies, Mama, and Gary." So we know the pecking order in our house :-)
One more thing, my RE (Fertility Specialist) shares an office with my OB and I see my nurses that helped me through IVF every time I go in and we chit-chat. Today as I was sitting there getting my blood work done for the 3 hour glucose testing, I realized I was sitting in the same chair I sat in back in October when I was going through IVF. That day the nurse told me that because of a sudden cyst on my ovary we were going to have to push back when we could start the next step of the process. IVF is such a delicate time table that any delay could mean starting completely over with the next cycle. And when you are in the middle of your infertility journey with hormones, shots, exams on a daily basis, any delay is heartbreaking. I remembered sitting there crying and my wonderful nurse holding my hand and telling me that it would be ok, that we would have a baby in the right time. (It turned out that the cyst went away and we were able to move forward as planned) As I sat there today with 2 beautiful baby girls snug inside me, remembering, it almost brought tears to my eyes. Talk about coming full circle, you know. I just have to take a moment and say a prayer of thanks that God has blessed us with these two miracle babies. How precious they are and how precious that I got a moment of reflection that prompted me to be thankful and grateful for where I am in my life right now.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Perinatal Appointment - Going the Distance
Abigail - 2 lb 8 oz
Olivia - 2 lbs 13 oz
Blood Pressure - 130/74 (a little high for me but still ok)
Weight Gain - +10 - 32 lbs total (Umm...can that possibly be right??)
Inches Around - 51 (3 inches in 2 weeks)
Really, really great appointment today. Short version: Everyone's great!
We got a good look at both girl's faces, but could only get a really good 3-D one of Olivia. Abigail was kicking back at the Sonogram wand like crazy. She had the hiccups, which is great because it means she is practicing her breathing! She is lying head down with her feet up in my ribs stretched out on the left side. Olivia is in a weird position on my right side. Her head is up and her feet are also close to the top, so she is breech right now, but can easily flip. It doesn't really matter what position they are in because we will have a c-section. Olivia also has more fluid than Abigail, which is not really a sign for concern by itself, but along with my glucose test (more about this below) and them being twins, it could point toward pre-term labor. They are doing a fetal fibronectin test, which tests to see if you will potentially go into pre-term labor in the next few weeks. Both of my previous tests have come back negative so I am expecting this one to as well. Their weights are right on target, in the 50th percentile for babies at this stage. This will drop in the weeks to come because their growth will slow down. My peri predicts 5 to 6 lb babies by 36 weeks. So they are doing great!!
I failed my glucose test, dang it! This could explain Olivia's extra fluid if I do have gestational diabetes. Now I have to go back and do a 3 hour test which totally sucks!! I can't have anything to eat or drink after midnight and I go in first thing in the morning, so it could be worse. I usually have two meals and a snack by the time I will finish the test so I am sure I will be starving. Ok...now the weight gain thing. Can that be right?? It is a new scale, so it could be wrong. On the other hand I do have my appetite back. Plus, 3 inches growth in 2 weeks! Holy Cow! So I am thinking...growth spurt all around.
She also checked my cervix and it is long and closed up tight. She predicts because of Z's birth and the way I am going that I can "go the distance". Which means I will probably make it 36 or 37 weeks! Whoo-hoo!! Such good news! Of course, she can't predict 100%, but I believe it!!
~Feel free to comment. It lets me know who is reading :-) ~
Olivia - 2 lbs 13 oz
Blood Pressure - 130/74 (a little high for me but still ok)
Weight Gain - +10 - 32 lbs total (Umm...can that possibly be right??)
Inches Around - 51 (3 inches in 2 weeks)
Really, really great appointment today. Short version: Everyone's great!
We got a good look at both girl's faces, but could only get a really good 3-D one of Olivia. Abigail was kicking back at the Sonogram wand like crazy. She had the hiccups, which is great because it means she is practicing her breathing! She is lying head down with her feet up in my ribs stretched out on the left side. Olivia is in a weird position on my right side. Her head is up and her feet are also close to the top, so she is breech right now, but can easily flip. It doesn't really matter what position they are in because we will have a c-section. Olivia also has more fluid than Abigail, which is not really a sign for concern by itself, but along with my glucose test (more about this below) and them being twins, it could point toward pre-term labor. They are doing a fetal fibronectin test, which tests to see if you will potentially go into pre-term labor in the next few weeks. Both of my previous tests have come back negative so I am expecting this one to as well. Their weights are right on target, in the 50th percentile for babies at this stage. This will drop in the weeks to come because their growth will slow down. My peri predicts 5 to 6 lb babies by 36 weeks. So they are doing great!!
I failed my glucose test, dang it! This could explain Olivia's extra fluid if I do have gestational diabetes. Now I have to go back and do a 3 hour test which totally sucks!! I can't have anything to eat or drink after midnight and I go in first thing in the morning, so it could be worse. I usually have two meals and a snack by the time I will finish the test so I am sure I will be starving. Ok...now the weight gain thing. Can that be right?? It is a new scale, so it could be wrong. On the other hand I do have my appetite back. Plus, 3 inches growth in 2 weeks! Holy Cow! So I am thinking...growth spurt all around.
She also checked my cervix and it is long and closed up tight. She predicts because of Z's birth and the way I am going that I can "go the distance". Which means I will probably make it 36 or 37 weeks! Whoo-hoo!! Such good news! Of course, she can't predict 100%, but I believe it!!
~Feel free to comment. It lets me know who is reading :-) ~
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